HOUSTON, TEXAS
I believe many of you already know this, so this is just to update my blog and record some monumental changes that are happening in our world. The last month has been very dramatic, crazy, intense, busy, and full of lots of emotions.
About a month ago I said to Jake "You never feel as alive as you do when you're in the midst of change." That has become a theme in our minds and we feel very alive to say the least. So, the change I'm referring to is: we're moving our little family to Houston, Texas.
Last month Jake flew to Cleveland for an interview with URS-Washington Division. His dad told him that one of his previous seminary teachers recruited with this company and that Jake should check into it. That was back in February. In June Jake contacted this man, and soon he was interviewing and a week after he received an offer and he accepted and he will start September 15th.
There are a whole lot of details in between so for those who want the jist of it there it is, but now for the details: this make take a while-sorry.
When Jake went to Cleveland, he took our only cell phone, and then my phone stopped working, and the phone company fixed it when he was flying home. So, I only spoke to him twice in the 3 days he was gone. (I had to use my neighbors phone.) I knew before he left he was very skeptical if this was right for us. We had discussed many of the pro's and con's and we felt we just needed to see this to its end, to show the Lord we would do all we could do to find a new job.
One of the big con's in our minds was relocating a lot. They move you every few years to a new site. We didn't know if we wanted to do that to our children, especially Jabren.
Well, Jake interviewed on Monday and that same day I watched my friends kids, and she told me that she already knew we were taking it. "Whatever." Then she reminded me of something I said a few years ago. "I just need a few years to get my feet under me before we go again (meaning leave Boise.)" I remembered saying that. I explained to her all the reasons we weren't liking the idea. So that night I couldn't pray at all. I didn't want to. I took my Ensign to bed with me, but didn't read. I just had too much caos in my head to settle my thoughts and be in tune with the Lord. I also didn't get to talk to Jake that night to ask how things went.
So, the next morning I rolled out of bed and began to pray. I explained how we had a lot of major concerns, and once I had unloaded all of them my burden was literally made light. All of my worries were lifted from my mind and complete peace enclosed me and I felt and could see only light in my mind and thoughts.
Immediately, I knew this was right. At first I was thinking "Oh, my goodness we're moving?" Then I thought "I'm not crying, thats weird." I was very calm. So I climbed back on my bed and pulled out my Ensign. The First Presidency message was by President Uchtdorf and the words leapt out of the page at me. He spoke of pioneers and their faith to leave all they knew. So much of what he wrote resonated with this opportunity I knew for certain this was right. That is when I began to cry. I knew this experience was an undeniable experience that I could not create for myself. And, I knew our lives were about to change dramatically.
So thats my morning. I knew Jake though. When I picked him up, luckily all the boys fell asleep so we were able to put them in bed and talk for a long time. He seemed to have very different feelings. He told me how sick he was about it, and nervous, and that in his hotel room he was not feeling good about it. Even now at home he didn't. So after he talked for over and hour and a half, I asked if he wanted to know what happened for me that morning.
At first he was confused and frustrated that I'd feel such peace when he felt sick. I didn't really say much. And I dropped it. I let him feel and be where he was at.
One thing I've learned in 8 years of marriage is that Jake dreads change. It can make him sick. He also needs to come to his conclusion on his own. So I let him have space.
(Also, getting back to work after the interview things there were turning very bad and seemed ugly-but ended up not being what he thought- but ironic because he's been one of their best employees for 5 years and it seemed time to leave in every conceivable way.)
He was also frustrated that the temple was closed. It always seems to be when you need it most. But oh the luck, our friend had ordered 5 tickets for her family to go to the Twin Falls Temple Open House for that coming Saturday, but needed to reschedule to go with some friends and she offered them to us. So we went with our family to the Temple and, though its not the same with kids, we felt peace there. When we got home there was a Fedex package at the door. We had an offer waiting on our door step right as we got home from the temple-hmmm?
Anyways, Jake was getting more comfortable discussing the possibility and then on Sunday night, randomly and very unlike either of our parents to be this spontaneous, they both showed up at our home within a half hour of each other. Jake talked with our parents and both seemed to be very supportive and encouraging about this opportunity. They took Jake's biggest concerns and refocused them and helped him look at it in a new perspective, but mostly they were just very encouraging and dispelled fear. As the men talked he started to get excited because there are some really neat opportunities to look forward to-just different than those of anyone we know so its unknown. One thing my dad said was "Roots are overrated" That was an inspired comment for us, at least. And we realize there's still plenty of time to put in roots. We think of our kids as getting older but our parents kept saying, but your kids are still young and very flexible.
You'd think they were ready to get rid of us, but we were glad to hear how much they supported whatever our decision was.
Funny thing, Jake's office right now is really struggling with the change in the market and as a whole they were asked to let the company know how committed they were to them and that if they were looking else where then-go! They wanted to know by Friday. Jake's offer from URS wanted to know by Friday. So many things we're just being swept up into this opportunity and facing us in this direction. As I experienced all of this, I felt as though the Lord has truly been guiding us to this. When the Lord closes a door he opens a window. The thing with windows is you have to jump to get out of them. Leaping can be scary.
So we accepted the offer and we're very excited. The opportunity to move around and see parts of this country and possibly others seems really neat for now. Not for forever.
I told Jake "I know getting all the little details figured out between here and moving there will eventually be worked out soon, though nerve-racking, but my concern would be if I felt we could never get back to Boise, which is where we want to end up." Well this company has one of its headquarters in downtown Boise. So even in that, I feel so much peace.
So, in gratitude, I must say that I've been so blessed with so many little experiences that feel like tender mercies of the Lord. They are happening regularly. So many, I've forgotten some. I'm learning so much from the Lord and about Him. From the morning I first prayed about this I have not doubted this choice; only once have I felt fear and been upset, but was quickly humbled and was able to learn another principle of the gospel from it. He is trying to teach me a lot and I'm enjoying being in this moment. There are more times than not that I feel like I'm just living each day with little change in the scenery that makes me need to rely on the Holy Ghost.
My newest thing I've learned is: "When we are modest we are humble, and when we are humble we invite the Spirit into our lives." (I'll find who said this later) To be honest, thats all I want. There are so many things that I can't figure out right now or even make happen if I wanted to. I can't do all it would take to possess all the knowledge I need to make some big decisions regarding our home here and there and where to live and what about schools, that I can only get through this with the Spirits guidance. Thats all I want. Things turn out better that way, too.
